Overcoming
Overcoming…to overcome, to persevere, to decide that what is on the other side of the discomfort is worth it all.
All, what is the all? Most obviously I think of a reward - the end goal produces a tangible shiny object born of our strife. A thing maybe we always wanted, or something bigger and better that shows how amazing we are. Ha! But, maybe, all is also all the strength we’ve built, all the pain we’ve worked through, all the insecurities we shed. All the things people can’t see, the invisible quiet workout, as my mom would say. All, could be the feelings of confidence, the experience gained, the fresh wisdom or a new perspective, a gentleness or deepening sense of compassion and empathy. We practiced as we were overcoming, the all is the masterpiece of practice. It is worth it all. You can’t have it all, unless you overcome and push through the ache and pains.
Overcoming is a common theme I’m seeing around me lately, including in myself.
First, the big global concepts like overcoming the differences in how we are raised vs how the world is now. Shout out to the millennial and gen x’ers, we are out here trying to figure ourselves out in a world that no longer exists as we remember. We are overcoming growing disparities and widespread turmoil in economic imbalance, communication, and self expression. What we wanted to be as kids isn’t accessible anymore, or it doesn’t feel so. And, then, I look around and my friends, my peers, are overcoming interpersonal communication challenges, redefining dating and relationships, overcoming childhood trauma, and navigating anxiety and panic as they feel not enough for what they want, if they even know what they want. I am not excluded. In the all there is overhwelmingness, it has not morphed into overcomingness yet, but that’s what it feels like, pressure, from everywhere on the outside and boiling up from the inside. I see now the metaphor of “spinning out of control” - those two pressures in opposition give me the image of a hurricane or a tornado spinning out of control. So, goodness, what do we do? Overcome?…cue eye roll. The work.
Gosh, now I feel silly saying overcome. Do you ever just not want to overcome? It looks like so much work, and the world is making us tired. Like, maybe the reward on the other side isn’t that great or worth it, because the overwhelmingness feels so oppressive, to stand against it feels like a monumental task for titan, let alone a fraction of life. Yes, I referred to us as a fraction of life - this earth has been here for billions of years, we live maybe 90, if we’re lucky, our life is a blip, a fraction of a fraction of life. So, why overcome? What’s in it for us? To say we can, to say we did. Maybe, if we overcome it all we’ll be able to make the small world around us better for those who are here too. That’s kind of nice. I want to help others. I want to make it through my stuff so that I can share my experiences, so that you might have the confidence to have yours and then share them so others may feel the same. Pay if forward, so to speak. So, maybe I’m saying, overcoming isn’t just about us, and the shiny object of our strife to show how impressive we are, but the knowing that our own work might mean something profound to someone else, pushing the course for the all of us. Maybe we are the all, makes all the sense if you believe we are all worth it.
So so so, all all all, maybe maybe maybe.
I guess I feel a little more inspired when I think about how I can help others the better I understand myself. They say that joy and accomplishment are on the outside of your comfort zone, outside the boundary - that boundary looks like a hair thin line on a piece of paper, but its depth is staggering - the work in a visual. And, the world on the other side, maybe not better than when you got here (because we all know the 90’s was the best decade), but your world, the small world in which you live, strive and thrive, that one will be a thousand times better, fuller, bigger, more open and deeper than you thought was possible. Maybe…😉Guess, you’ll just have to go for it to find out. Me too, I have to go for it, even when I am not sure if it’s all worth it.
Pro Tip: Learn from other’s mistakes - it’ll save you so much time.
What are your thoughts?
Here are some of the things I’m overcoming: (non exhaustive)
Lack of direction
Sense of displacement from childhood
Loss of self
Economic pressure - Scarcity
Am I enough - What should I do to be enough?
Panic and Anxiety about the future - I am reactionary and a borderline escapist
For reference, I’m 37 and it doesn’t necessarily get easier, but you do get better. Do any of these resonate with you? Share with me.
